BONSOIR | THE JOURNAL

Transformational Life Coach Tamsin Williamson gives us her top tips on how to stay positive when things are tough.


These are unquestionably challenging times, and as we go through this new phase of adapting and adjusting, our mindset and wellbeing will no doubt be put through their paces.

An array of uncomfortable emotions and reactions are likely to repeatedly push their way into the limelight, shoving our friend ‘positivity’ into the wings. However amidst these tough times there are lots of really simple steps that we can take to stay on a positive and optimistic path…

1. Journaling

Getting thoughts or feelings out of our heads and onto paper can be hugely therapeutic and cathartic. Taking some time every day to check in with yourself and clear your head can mean that you start the day feeling lighter and more proactive. It doesn't have to be time consuming either - check out ‘Two Minute Mornings’, a journaling technique which uses 3 simples prompts to help you kick start your day.   

2. Get Outdoors 

Whether you head into your back garden, take a turn around the block or go for a longer roam in the countryside or woods, being outdoors is proven to have a highly beneficial effect on our mental health. When you are feeling anxious or agitated, exposure to natural surroundings can help you to feel more calm, grounded and spacious in yourself. It will restore a sense of balance, help you feel positive and inspired, and energise you physically and mentally.    

3. Human Connection 

Human connection can do wonders for alleviating the mental load of life. While we can often feel stranded on our own island, it’s highly likely that someone else out there can offer some support or wisdom. Think about who is on your wavelength, whose opinion you trust, or who brings out your best, and arrange to have a chat. Getting thoughts out of your head can make you feel so much lighter, and that shared empathy and reassurance can bring a whole world of perspective, positivity and clarity to a situation. 

4. Learn Something New 

There’s a raft of positive feelings that accompany mastering a new skill or opening your mind to learning something new, which can provide the perfect antidote when times are challenging. Whether you get stuck into a DIY project, learn to knit, learn a new language or listen to a podcast on an interesting new subject, you are likely to experience positive feelings such as pride, achievement, inspiration, self-confidence and fulfilment which will undoubtedly lift your spirits. 

5. Helping Other People 

Helping others is a great way to create a positive mindset shift, and provides a feel-good distraction from the things weighing us down. Not only will an act of kindness bring huge positivity to those benefitting, but being generous and thoughtful towards others will also build our own self-esteem, happiness and optimism.    

6. Switch up your energy 

When we are feeling down beat, it can feel hard to pull ourselves out of our funk. So, try switching things up to mentally and physically shift yourself out of your rut and into a more positive headspace. Doing exercise is a great way to do this – something high energy like going for a jog, or more nurturing like yoga or meditation. You could call a friend for a chat, watch an episode of your favourite show or even have a kitchen disco to your favourite song! All of these ideas will deviate your mind or body into a new space and create a new energy to lift your spirits.  

7. See The Good Stuff 

It’s often easier to get bogged down in the negatives that have happened rather than recognise the positives, especially when we might be feeling less chirpy. But, when we do stop to acknowledge the moments of joy or beauty in our lives it has a direct impact on our ability to think positively. One way to put this into practice is to take a minute to jot down the positive daily moments you’ve experienced, even noticing the more subtle or fleeting moments that may have otherwise been missed. Perhaps commit to acknowledging three good things from each day and see how it impacts on your state of mind. 

8. Don’t forget to BREATHE 

When life feels overwhelming or stressful we can go into ‘panic mode’, which makes it hard to think clearly or positively. Taking time to hit pause and do a few deep breathing exercises takes a matter of minutes, and can really help to cut through the emotional intensity you are experiencing. Close your eyes and take 3 long, deep breaths, in through the nose and out through the mouth, one after the other. Those deep breaths will send more oxygen to your brain, which in turn will help calm your mind and body, slow down your spiralling thoughts and support you to feel more optimistic. 


Tamsin Williamson – The Parenthood Coach
Tamsin is an accredited Transformational Life Coach who is passionate about supporting unfulfilled Mums to rule life while raising kids. She offers 1:1 holistic coaching programmes for women, and shares thoughts and ideas daily on Instagram around wellbeing, mindset and identity.


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